Buck Angel has made history as
the world’s first female-to-male transsexual (FTM) Porn Star.
He’s an entrepreneur with a look
and style all his own. Angel has gone from pioneering an entirely new
adult industry genre (FTM Porn), to appearing in mainstream press on
the Howard Stern Show, to working with major production companies
including Titan Media.
Recently, Angel signed a major distribution deal with one of Europe’s
largest DVD Distributors, Shots Video. International demand has led him
to exclusive management by FL Promotions in Europe. In 2007, Angel made
history again, when he became the first FTM to win the prestigious
Transsexual Performer of the Year Award from AVN.
Currently, Angel is preparIng for an upcoming European tour and release
of a ground-breaking adult feature Buckback Mountain.
More information on Buck can be found at his website,
www.buckangel.com
Buck spoke with Mark Adnum via email in March 2007.
MARK ADNUM:
Love the name. How'd you choose it?
BUCK ANGEL: I love the name too! Thanks. Well I wanted
a very butch name to go along with my super-masculine porn image and
"Buck" is such a great macho name. It is not all that common, so it
seemed just right. As for the Angel part, well, that's my wife's last
name. She happens to be one of the most amazing and lucky people I have
ever met. So I put those two names together and bam! It was perfect.
Everyone comments on what a great name it is, and I think it sticks in
peoples minds. One interviewer said it was "the perfect mix of
masculine and feminine," but I had never thought of it that way before.
Though I have to agree I think it is. Not that I am in any way
feminine. But I guess having a pussy makes people think of feminine
(funny how that works, huh!)
MA: You say you recently moved from the United States.
Where are you now, and what prompted the change?
BA: Yes, I moved from the USA about
9 months ago to a little town in the Yucatan, in Mexico. I had lived in
New Orleans for four years and loved it there. But I was really getting
tired of the government's crap. They started coming down hard on the
adult industry and I felt sort of like a target because I am so unique;
and there is no precedent. They're targeting "obscenity" which is
ill-defined by the law. I didn't want them to make an example out of
me. I didn't feel safe in the US. Kind of ironic, huh?
I also felt like I wanted to experience other parts of the world. I had
lived in the US my whole life. I bought my place in Mexico right before
Hurricane Katrina, that same month. People think I moved because of the
hurricane, but that is not true, as I had planned to move before the
disaster hit. I truly love that city, and what happened there is so
hideous. What a disgrace. The government would never treat people like
that in Mexico! We still have property in New Orleans and my wife still
has a business there. It is a dog clothing store called Chi-wa-wa Ga-ga.
I love living in the Yucatan. Life is so amazing here. I have an
incredible piece of property, a maid, a cook, and a grounds keeper. I
rescued two dogs. I would not have this quality of lifesytle in the US.
It's a win/win situation for all involved. I don't want you to think I
am some crazy white man taking advantage of the poor Mexican labor. I
totally take great care of them and they take good care of me!
MA: From the waist up, Buck, I
think you're the hottest thing out. The truck driver torso, the tatts,
the occasional cigar hanging from your mouth: you're my fantasy man.
Thing is, one of my fantasies is sucking off my fantasy man's cock.
Yet, your pussy doesn't put me off at all - on the contrary, I think it
only makes you sexier, despite the visual inconsistency. What's your
take on this little mystery?
BA: Well thank you very much! You
know it takes a real man to admit that they are attracted to me. I
think what I am doing is so powerful and so crazy! You know I never in
a million years expected this to happen. I just had an idea to make
some porn that no one else was doing. I did not realize that it would
go in so many directions. My work is surpassing porn--it is getting
people to think, and to talk. And not exclusively people interested in
my porn. I am making people think about gender and sexuality. What
exactly is it that makes a man just that: a man?
I think a lot of things are going on. Historically the options have
been very limiting and putting people in boxes, for example, you HAD to
be gay, straight, or bi. You couldn't just be "sexual." You had to be
one of those given categories. Black and white, only. Well, guess what?
There's gray and purple and lots of other options and variations. I am
showing the world that is not as limited as people thought. In our
society, you have to be a man or a woman...and the only way you are
defined is by your genitals..well guess what THAT'S not valid either.
Look at Buck Angel. You cannot deny that I am all man. And when I have
sex with a man it is obviously man-on-man action--it looks "gay." But,
in that situation you also have a cock going into a pussy, so...is it
straight? (Interesting, right?)
Now what are people gonna think? They hate when things don't fit in the
box. But it makes them take notice and talk.
MA: When you go out socially and
pick up someone who doesn't know who you are, what happens later when
the pants come off at home?
BA: That would NEVER happen. I
would never fail to tell anyone before we got home (that I am a man
with a pussy). That is not cool at all. This is why many transsexual
girls get the shit beat out of them. They try fooling the guys they
meet. Well you know, I would be pissed if someone deceived me, too.
Not that it's ok to beat someone up under those or any circumstances.
But, really, put yourself in their shoes. Like I said before, people
have issues and have needs to label and be labeled. So if a guy comes
home with me thinking he is gonna suck my cock and sees my pussy, what
do you think he is gonna do? He will probably freak out. Then the whole
night is ruined.
BA: It is my responsibility to be
honest about myself. I am proud of who I am. This is also why my work
is so important: because I know other transsexuals see my work and feel
inspired to be proud. We have to be okay with ourselves because the
bottom line is we are the only ones who can make ourselves happy. I
really don't care what people think of me. I love myself, I have pride
in my body, and feel comfortable with myself. And by demonstrating
that, people will, in turn, be able to feel positive about me and to
love me. I have seen it happen.
MA: Camille Paglia once advised a man
considering a sex-change operation to, put "the operation on hold. Some
merchandise is nonreturnable". Any regrets, Buck?
BA: Good advice! I love Camille;
she is awesome. Regrets? No way! It was the best thing I ever did for
myself. I was on a path of self destruction. I hated myself, I was a
slobbering alcholic and drug addict living on the streets. I was
desperately unhappy and was a total mess. I really wanted to kill
myself. I could no longer live in that female body. I made a
life-changing decision with the help of a therapist I had my sex
change, and completely turned my life around.
I do want to say that I feel today that many people are not taking it
as seriously as I think they should. It seems like having a sex change
has become some sort of a trend. A sex change is utterly life-altering
and when you take hormones, physical changes occur that you cannot
reverse. You must understand what you're getting into before you do it.
Many people get hormones underground, don't see a therapist, then all
of a sudden realize they made a mistake. I have seen it happen many
times. A sex change is not a joke.
I think it is amazing now that transsexuals are so accepted and how
comparatively easy it is to change. When I started my change there
wasn't a lot of information, and there were hardly any other guys
having sex changes. I lost many of my lesbian friends because they
hated that I was becoming a man. Funny thing is, I have since gotten
calls from some of them asking me for advice on how to start the
change. I went through it all alone. But you know I think that is part
of what made me a strong man. Bottom line is to make sure what you
really want for the rest of your life!
MA: I understand that surgical construction of a penis
is often unsatisfactory, which is why most FTM's such as yourself
choose to keep your vagina. Do you desire a cock? It strikes me that
even though you are so manly, the one manly thing you cant do (without
a strap-on) is fuck someone with your own dick, and this, in a sense,
keeps you in a feminised position. What do you say?
BA: Man I love this question.
People just can't get around my pussy as a female thing. My pussy is
all man. Many, many gay men have a hole THEY like to have fucked. That
doesn't make them female. I think it is a shame that people just cannot
get their heads around that. I have a lot of work to do to help make it
clear that the cock does not make the man. Nothing about me feels
feminized. And my cocks (I have many) are ALWAYS hard, and I can even
provide my partner with the right size for the current mood. Hell, even
favorite color is an option! I've never had any complaints, and I
derive a lot of pleasure from fucking a partner, even if my cock isn't
part of my body.
I do not desire to have a cock though I used to want one before I
became comfortable with myself and when I thought that I needed to have
one to be WHOLE (but now I'd just rather use my HOLE). Yes many FTMs do
no have the surgery because it just doesn't appeal to us. Others don't
because they can't afford it. Surgery can cost 50-57K! Frankly, I'd
rather have a new truck.
Now there are two FTM schools of thought. One believes you have to have
a cock or you will never be a man. And then, of course, there is the
Buck Angel perspective. Many FTMs from the one side hate the Buck Angel
side because we are showing that you don't need a piece of meat between
your legs to be a man. I personally would never get that surgery as it
is today. It doesn't appeal to me and is way too expensive and is just
not perfect. I like perfect!
My heart, my mind, my soul, and ninety-some percent of my body is ALL
male. The facts that I have a pussy, and don't have a cock (that's
attached) just aren't deal-breakers on my gender. Nothing makes me feel
like I'm in a "feminised position" ever.
MA: Buck, I have to ask for myself and for what must be
the many tens of thousands of gay men around the world who have often
wondered about this but have no way of finding out. Where does it feel
better: up the ass or up the cunt?
BA: I get a lot of positive
feedback from guys who fuck a lot of ass that pussy actually feels
REALLY GOOOOD! Frankly I've been surprised about how many gay men
genuinely like pussy, at least when it is on a man.
I love getting fucked in my cunt. I have yet to really get fucked in my
ass. Why should I when I have a perfectly good cunt to fuck? All of the
gay men I fuck already have plenty of experience with that, so with
Buck Angel it is all about the pussy. I have tried to do a double
penetration but my ass is too tight. I am working on being able to do
it, though.
I also want to let you know that it does not make me a Bottom because I
get fucked. I am a Top and like to have my hole serviced. It does not
make me feel like a "woman" either. I feel like a big butch mother
fucker getting his cunt fucked!!
